We Are Grown Ups!!!!

I hate it when people make me realize every time that I am a grown up now, that I can’t sit back home and cry for those petty little matters. I hate it when my mom tells me to get over those cherished moments of my life that I had spent with my loving friend and stop moaning about him not being a part of my life anymore. I hate it when a close friend always remarks “She is not out of school yet!!!” They, the people who are the most closest to me, with whom I spend most part of my day, expect me to behave like a grown up. Forget all feelings, emotions, nostalgia, and behave like a sensible grown up. But…why? Just because we are over that juvenile phase of our lives, our tears have lost their value? Even if I want to shout, be scared and freak out at the sight of a cat or a crazy dog running on the road, I can’t; for that would be disgraceful of a grown up at 23! And that’s where I lose myself, in the quest of behaving like a grown up at 23. I miss my bum-chums and feel like crying, I can’t shed my tears in the light. Darkness has to accompany me so that the world can perceive me like an ideal grown up. For those little demands of life, it’s an embarrassment for me to ask someone to lend me 100 bucks. I can’t scream for an ice-cream anymore or a bucket of flowers to be sent my way on my birthday. A wish to celebrate my birthday by cutting a cake with lots of gifts under my pillow would be a looney thought. I would definitely be a nutcase to talk about the Cinderella story. And, I definitely need some psychiatric help if I am longing for an elder brother’s care and protection at 23. Yeah, I think I am coming into terms with being a grown up and with me, what is growing everyday are my emotions, pains, and fears of surviving in this world of grown-ups.